Day 127/ 365
So I’ve been doing much better since the last time I checked in here. I fluctuated a bit with my emotions but overall I’ve been doing quite well – I just haven’t had the time to consistently blog and since I was feeling a bit low in my physical health – I allowed myself to rest quite a bit and I basically put very minimum pressure on myself to do things (including blogging – although I still spent a significant amount of time with my thoughts and have a bunch of notes in my iPhone’s notes app that I eventually want to organize and share here).
My overall outlook on life? So positive. I feel like there is so much to do and be and so very little time. I really wish I had more time in a day to do all the things that need to get done (or things that I would like to be able to get done). I have spent a good amount of time focusing on myself and putting myself first, even before my work and business – but I think I am ready to start putting more time into work again. It’s not about what I ‘want’ to do, it’s more about what I ‘need’ to do. I don’t ‘love’ working – I do like it but I really don’t ‘love’ it. It’s not like I desire to be putting so many more hours a week into working – it’s just that I feel that it is required at this stage of the business and something I really should do to be more supportive of my husband (and our future and even present). There is so much to do and organize, it doesn’t make sense to be taking it easy at this point (unless I am actually mentally incapable of working – which did happen to me at one point and that’s when I started prioritizing myself because really I had no other choice).
I recently asked myself what I would do if I had just one day to live – and ‘work’ was not on the list (except transferring as much information and knowledge that’s in my head to my husband/or someone else working in the business so that they wouldn’t be have to struggle too much without me). I recently decided on creating a Training/Policy manual for my own work so that if and when something was to happen to me – someone could be able to take over more easily. Of course anything and everything can eventually be figured out by someone anyways, but it’s so much easier when you’re given information and aren’t wasting time trying to figure things out. So regardless of how much time I have, it is on my work to do list to start creating a Training/policy manual and to also ask other employees to be creating these for their roles… just makes everyones lives easier.
Today a question that I had is how can I train my body to sleep less? because I have so much that I want to do, I would really like to master being able to sleep less so I can do more. I don’t yet have the answer but this is something I’d like to figure out. I physically get sick when I don’t sleep enough… my body actually gives up on me… so I really have to find a smart way to be able to do more (or just learn to manage my time really well so that less time is ‘wasted’).
So some additional thoughts from today before I call it a day and head to bed:
- I have so much thoughts, so many feelings… I feel like my life would go wasted if I didn’t explore everything inside me. If I didn’t get to know my own self – what a waste of life would that be? I deserve to get to know myself better.
- I should prioritize putting in the time and effort to love myself. When you love someone, you spend time with them and get to know them. Why don’t we do that for ourselves? Don’t we deserve to love ourselves?
- Life feels great. So much to do so less time.
- Truth: I wish I could work less. Another truth: you have to work hard to achieve something in life. Everyone works hard to be able to afford the things they have. So work hard. Still take time to take care of myself so that I don’t feel burned out but just work and work hard and put my best into everything I do.